Hi,
It’s been a while since I’ve thought about you. Honestly, I would rather forget you. Erase you from existence. That way, I wouldn’t have gone through the emotions that I did with you. If it weren’t for you, I would be free of scars and as happy as can be. If it weren’t for you, maybe my heart wouldn’t be as cold and lonely as it is now. If it weren’t for you, I would be a totally different woman. But then again, that is why I appreciate you.
If it weren’t for you, I may not’t be as strong minded and focused as I am today. Sure we’ve been through some bad times, but if I were to completely erase you from my existence, that means I would have to forget the good times. And trust me, when they were good, they were GOOD. If it weren’t for you, I may not be where I am today…I may not want the things I want…I may not do the things I do. If it weren’t for you, my life would be based on a fairy-tale.
Because of you, Past, I am able to know who is there for me and who isn’t. I am able to swim through the crowds of people who are “here right now,” and stick to the people who always have my best interests in mind. I am able to advocate for myself, and advocate for others. I am able to say that I have put blood, sweat and tears into my goal, which I can see in the near distance. Because of you, I am me. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
I remind myself daily “Don’t ever forget your past, because that is where you came from. And if you don’t know where you came from, how can you know where you are going?” I know where I am going because I know where I came from. No matter how hard I try, I can never forget my past. It has molded me into the woman I am today, and that woman is shaping her future. So to my past, I say a grand “THANK YOU.” Because of you, I can be satisfied with the future I am building for myself.
-Nina
